We're Going on a Bear Hunt

Maybe it's a not a BEAR hunt, but I am hunting.  I'm hunting for "me".   

Side-bar:  I wouldn't really call this a mid-life crisis, as I'm only 30.  Maybe a mid-mid life crisis?

In the story, dad takes the kids for a trek through the woods to find a bear, chanting "we're not scared!" the whole way.  Along the way they run into obstacles...like the grass, then the forest, then a river, and they finally reach the cave...where they actually find the bear.  Now they run away from the bear back home.  I guess dad really never imagined they'd FIND one!

I have a million things on my plate right now...and I rarely feel like I'm doing any of them well (or at least at a 100%), but part of me yearns for the crafty, artsy, free side of me that I think is buried deep.

Just today I have made goals of sewing my girl some cute summer dresses after seeing some adorable items on blogs and uh-hmm, Pinterest. (Hello, my name is Kayla and I'm addicted to Pinterest).  In my head I said, "Oh man!  I can totally make that! And cheaper too!"  We'll see...I own a sewing machine so how hard can it be? :)  Obstacle #1...I own no patterns or REAL sewing skills.  Just what I've taught myself.

Just today I have been plotting my summer with my kiddos, telling myself I was finally going to be prepared for the day in and day out of being home with them again.   Obstacle #2...Mr. Kindergartener will be in Summer School for part of it.

Just today I have planned to do many wonderful and new things!  Obstacle #3...I have a million things on my plate right now...and I rarely feel like I'm doing any of them well (or at least at a 100%).  I know my house is not spic and span.  I know I have clothes that need to be washed (or rewashed...I think I left a load in the washer. :(  Ooops.)  I know I have papers to grade.  I know I need to...And the list goes on.

But part of me yearns for the crafty, artsy, free side of me that I think is buried deep.  Deep in that bear cave.

And my bear is there too...hibernating.  It's waiting to be jarred back to life.

I've seen other moms find their "bear in the cave" and I rejoice for them!  I want to find something I enjoy doing just for fun, maybe for others, maybe for my kids, maybe for my husband and maybe just for me.  They inspire me to pull up my bear hunting boots and set out on an adventure!  Oh, and like this dad, my kids are definitely coming with me on this adventure! 

I'm on a hunt for who I am and who I'd like to be. 

I don't plan on finding the "cave" tonight, or even tomorrow.

But hopefully I can awaken the bear soon.